[First paragraph is in response to A. worrying about tension between us if he were to help an old sub to move in late May:] “If I can just be blunt: I really don’t care. …It’s certainly nothing that has to be figured out 2 months in advance. I know you are a one-sub guy, but let’s please not pretend like we’re in a monogamous relationship. You’re married. I’m dating other people. I wouldn’t have walked into this situation if I had any intention of being territorial. I understand where you’re coming from, though, and it was thoughtful to check in with me about it.
“Lastly: Frankly, [A.], I was taken aback by your suggestion of subsidizing my rent. Even if I wanted to move out and have a place of my own (I don’t), it would be incredibly unwise of me to accept a handout of that sort. You’re a planner, you’re thinking ahead, you’re just throwing out potential solutions to a problem…I get it. And this isn’t to discredit your generosity. But I felt that your offer was extremely inappropriate. I’d feel the same way even if we’d been together for a while, but especially so considering the short amount of time we’ve known each other.
“So this is where my head’s at: I have thoroughly enjoyed talking and playing with you so far. Thursday night was incredibly hot, incredibly pleasurable, and you left me intrigued and interested in getting together again. Overall, I appreciate how respectful you’ve been. But I get the feeling that you perhaps get ahead of yourself, or get wrapped up in relationships more quickly than I do. This is a pretty significant red flag for me, and I’d like you to slow down. I don’t want to enmesh myself in your life, and right now I don’t want you enmeshed in mine. You may have jumped straight into the deep end with your subs in the past, and that’s fine if that’s what they wanted. I, on the other hand, would like to test the waters and get to the deep end eventually if all continues to go well.”
So that’s that.